Life away from the Far-Right is, in all honesty completely different to the life I lived when I was in the Far-Right.
When I use to be involved in the movement, I was always so paranoid when I was on my own. I used to find myself studying every car that passed me to make sure no one was following me. If I was walking home, I’d take my time by taking different turns here and there, just in case anyone was trying to follow me and map my usual walk home.
I could honestly go on for a while talking about all these things I use to do because of my paranoia, it’s a hard life being involved in extremist politics and it’s not a good one for anyone.
However, nowadays it totally different. It’s like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders. Nowadays when I walk around, I don’t feel like I’m constantly under threat, or like I have to look over my shoulder anymore. I feel free and this allows me to enjoy the little things that you would have otherwise missed as your mind was elsewhere.
On top of this you start to see more opportunities for yourself to progress in life. Not long after I deleted my social media profile that was full of Far-Right content, I got a job. That little bit of money in my pocket and of course having something to occupy my time really did help me. It helped me not only in the sense of build my confidence, but it also allowed me to build better social skills again talking to different colleagues.
If I was to summarise how I felt after leaving the Far Right I would say I felt free. When I was in the Far-Right it was like I was an animal locked inside of a very small enclosure. Constantly going round seeing and hearing the same old thing day in day out. However, when I left it was like the walls around me was lifted and I was free to roam and explore anywhere I wanted. It was like for the first time the world was limitless. This feeling is something that is so hard to describe, but the best way I suppose is to say that it is liberating and such a unique powerful feeling.
If you’re reading this and you’re involved with the Far-Right I’d really encourage you to get yourself on a better path and discover what that feeling I just talked about us is like, because you deserve to feel it to.
John, 21 – Exit Support Worker.